TO MY BRIGHTEST SUSHH ❤️

Dearest Sushh..

What do I say? How do I say? and… how do I describe anything that is left within me?

Ok let me start, with the most heavy heart and tear filled eyes I am writing this note for you…hope this reaches right up to you where ever you are <3

It was June 1, 2009 – I was 5 and was going to be 6 in 17 days (My birthday-June 18). So what was on June 1? Pavitra Rishta releasing date….it was when it aired on Zee Tv and 5 y/o me sat to watch it just because I love watching saas bahu and love type shows since that age. Trust me, the first time ever
they showed you as our beloved “MANAV”, since that time I love you :).

MANAV-ARCHANA were my favourite couple, and dumb me never knew what is shooting, acting is …and ofc I was just 5 so I thought all these as real stories, haha, everyday I sat infront on TV by 9 pm sharp. Your OVERWHELMING SMILE kills me since then.

Yeah this is true that being small didn’t make me understand every romantic dialogue or scene but I did enjoy them. I’ve watched it till end. It was my family’s fav show, it was heart breaking when you left in between, you know what? I skipped episodes which you weren’t in :'(

BUT AGAIN YOU CAME IN ENDING…AND I AGAIN WATCHED, TILL THE END, 25 OCTOBER 2014. The 6 years of admiring you 🙂

I was 10 by then sushh.

Here comes when you became BOLLYWOOD STAR. KAI PO CHE, 2013 (I was 9)…god watching you die in movies itself was hurting enough… but still I did watch all of your movies and HOW wouldn’t I? SHUDDH DESI ROMANCE, 2013…man, can anyone else be more romantic like you haha. I never knew what is this kinda feeling which always made me like you, love you, and admire you. DETECTIVE BYOMKESH BAKSHY, 2015…Sadly I missed watching this…still couldn’t find where to watch…but I will. PK,2014….AWW MY DEAR SARFARAZ. Can you walk CHAR KADAM with me 🙁 ? please come back my dearest. You killed in every scene, uff your smile. I’d say you have the best infectious smile that I have ever seen sush, which infected me badly 😉 thennnnnn? my GODDDD, THE BEST AND SUPERHIT which none else would’ve done better than in a way you did, the one and only MS.DHONI, 2016. THANKS SUSHH FOR BEST STORY. RAABTA WILL BE MY FOREVER FAV SHIV:) AND WE ALSO HAVE A RAABTA. KEDARNATH, 2018..this film is close to me…you die in this too, and now I need a lot of guts and strength to watch it again :/ A film from which every song I dedicate to you, mostly JAAN NISAAR, I’d always say to my mom that when one day I meet you by any chance I’d sing this song for you, but I guess god already had plans to not make this happen. 🙁 CHHICHHORE? my jaan kya acting ki thi… I almost got flat on you by then. Wish I’d have chance to hug you once sush. Like what is the one thing you didn’t have talent in? DRIVE MEIN KYA LOOK THI….. YEH PAGAL SA HAI PYAAR MERA OH MAKHNA VE MAKHNA… then? no sushh… I can’t write up for this but I want to, but first, never knew you’d reply to your fans like I’ve seen nowadays. If I ever knew I would have commented tons and tons of times and left my message but I never got a chance to do so :(. DIL BECHARA, SHOULD I SAY ABOUT THIS FILM? SORRY SUSH, BUT EVEN TAKING THIS NAME HURTS AND BREAKS ME INTO HALVES, SUSHHH NEVER KNEW YOUR JOURNEY WOULD END THIS WAY AND LEAVE ALL OF US LIKE THIS. THESE MONTHS FEELS LIKE FOREVER. THIS IS A PAIN WHICH HAS NO MEDICINE.

“Come at least once as air, come at least once as waves or come at least once as shadows.”

I’M 16, AND TODAY I PROUDLY SAY I’M AN SSRIAN. WHY SUSH? WHY DID GOD TAKE U SO SOON FROM US? SINCE JUNE 14, I’M BROKEN, AFTER 4 DAYS, IT WAS MY BDAY AND I’D CRY FOR YOU. EVERYDAY ALL I SEE IS YOUR INTERVIEWS, YOUR SMILE, YOUR INSTA FEED, YOUR SONGS, MOVIES, PICS AND EVERTHING ONLY ABOUT YOU.

MY FULL FEED, BE INSTA, YOUTUBE, GOOGLE, ALL THE NOTIFICATIONS ARE ONLY FILLED WITH YOU. MY GALLERY HAS PRESERVED A SPECIAL PLACE FOR YOU. ALL I DO IS PRAY WHEN THE CULPRITS GONNA BE PUNISHED AND WHEN WOULD MY SUSH GET JUSTICE ?

WISH I SPOKE ONCE TO YOU EVER. I KNOW SUSH YOU ARE WATCHING IT ALL FROM ABOVE AND YOU KNOW HOW MY TEARS ROLL DOWN MY CHINS EVERY NIGHT. MY HEART SAYS ONLY 3 LETTERS.

“S S R”

EVERY HEART BEAT GOES ON WITH SSR. YOU’VE NOT GONE ALONE SUSH BUT YOU HAVE TAKEN A PART OF MY HEART WITH YOU.

HOW DO I DESCRIBE OR THANK YOU FOR TEACHING ME A LOT OF THINGS, YOUR SELFMUSING QUOTES ARE THE BEST ONES.

YOU ARE, WERE , AND ALWAYS WILL BE MY ONLY INSPIRATION EVER SUSH. THANKS FOR MAKING ME ADMIRE YOU SINCE I WAS 5 AND FOREVER. MAY BE YOU WONT BE PHYSICALLY PRESENT WITH US BUT YOU WONT BE ABSENT ALSO. YOU’LL BE FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS, PRAYERS AND THOUGHTS. I ALWAYS WILL MISS THAT I NEVER GOT A CHANCE OF GIVING YOU CHOCOLATES AND ICE CREAMS 🙁 

EVERYDAY I PRAY FOR THE JUSTICE TO BE GIVEN TO YOU BUT I GUESS THIS IS PARIKSHA KI GHADI FOR ALL OF US. DONT WORRY SUSH, I WANNA TELL YOU ONE THING TODAY, WE, FANS, WILL NEVER LET YOU DOWN, WE WILL FIGHT UNTIL THE END. JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED AND CULPRITS WILL BE PUNISHED. TODAY WHOLE WORLD IS WITH US AND IS FIGHTING FOR YOU.

Addicted to your charmness, I am your fan from past 11 years and will be forever. My fav quote by you “THE ONE WHO SAYS SHE CAN AND THE ONE WHO SAYS SHE CAN’T ARE USUALLY RIGHT”

SPECIAL NOTE: FOR YOU, JUST FOR YOU, I’VE BOUGHT THE SAME “SCHRODINGER’S SMILEY” TEE THAT I WOULD WEAR IN YOUR MEMORY.

HOPE YOU ARE FLYING AROUND THE STARS AND MOON AND HAVING A BEST JOURNEY THROUGHOUT THE GALAXY, THE ONES WHICH YOU WERE MOST OBSESSED WITH. 

JAI SHIV SHAMBU:)

BY CLOSEST ADMIRER,

SHRU